How many times have you said or done something you later regretted? How many times, in the heat of a moment, have you spoken angry or discouraging words to someone, or in a pressure situation with people, escalated the pressure instead of defusing it?
All of us have horror stories to tell about our lapses of consideration and kindness. If you are like me, there are conversations you wish you could recall and situations you wish you could redo. How can we avoid similar regrets in the future?
The answer is found in one word, “thoughtfulness.” In retrospect, much of our interpersonal pain is the result of thoughtlessness:
- We speak before we think.
- We act before we consider the consequences of our actions.
The Bible contains many instructions and encouragements related to thoughtfulness. Here are a couple:
“Do you see a man who speaks in haste? There is more hope for a fool than for him.” — Proverbs 29:20
“My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires.” – James 1:19, 20
While thoughtfulness involves avoiding hasty words and actions by putting some good and healthy restrictions on ourselves, it also involves taking positive actions toward others. Thoughtfulness is defined as:
- Consideration of the feelings of others.
- Giving close and careful attention to what we do and say.
- Having depth.
- Acting with good sense.
- Actions that communicate kindness and care.
Think about the many ways you could improve the lives of others by being more thoughtful. By speaking an encouraging word, doing a kind deed, sending a note of thanks, preparing something special for someone — a little more thoughtfulness could make a huge difference in our marriages, our work places, our friendship and our churches!
Pastor Dale
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