| 1:33 min read |
Maybe you have the same problem I have at times. Sometimes I speak before I think! It’s a common failure.
A key ingredient in mature, healthy relationships is the discipline to think before speaking. God says it this way in Proverbs 10:19 (NLT) “Too much talk leads to sin. Be sensible and keep your mouth shut.” The Living Bible paraphrase brings this verse to life, “Don’t talk so much. You keep putting your foot in your mouth. Be sensible and turn off the flow!”
How true! Just a bit more self-control in our conversations would save us a lot of pain and help us avoid lots of relationship problems. We just need to think before we speak.
What does this mean? It means that, before we say something to someone, we need to filter it first. Here are some great filters to consider before saying things you could later regret:
• T = Is it true? If it’s not true, I don’t need to talk about it.
• H = Is it helpful (and healthful)? If not, you will be hurting someone.
• I = Is it inspiring? Does it put wind into someone sails for good, or take it away?
• N = Is it necessary? Much of what we say really isn’t necessary to say. We often say things to others more for ourselves—to get someone off our chest—to “give someone a piece of our mind”—rather than for their benefit. (Always remember, when you give someone a “piece of your mind,” what does it leave you with? Less of a mind!)
• K = Is it kind? How can I communicate in ways that reflect kindness and care?
When you think before you speak, your friendships flourish!