Everybody has their “way” of doing things. Our opinion is that our way is the right way, and in some cases, the only way! This creates a lot of stress and tension in relationships. When two people, with two different ways of thinking, try to solve a problem, accomplish a goal, or make a decision, all the ingredients are present for potential conflict. And when no one is willing to adjust their way of thinking, conflict becomes inevitable.

A lot of relationships exist in a perpetual fight zone. The parties move from active warfare to brief, superficial truces, only to be drawn back into battle when the next problem or decision point arises. This pattern can last for years, and even decades. Why? Because no one is willing to give in, yield and change. Getting “my way” becomes more important to many folks than making and experiencing peace.

Real love looks for ways to communicate, connect and even make appropriate compromises. The God-kind of love looks for common ground, strives for harmony, and values unity. A person practicing true love is willing to give up “the right to always be right!” In the practical challenges of daily decisions, problem-solving and pressures, love finds ways to work together for what’s best. Loving people seek to build with others rather than tearing one another apart or settling for separate corners of a relational boxing ring. Love knows when and how to surrender, submit and defer in humility. As Paul the apostle, under the influence of the Holy Spirit, wrote about 2,000 year ago, “Love doesn’t demand it’s own way!” 1 Corinthians 13:5 (NLT).