Have you ever been overdrawn? Not in your bank account, but in a relationship.
Relationships work best when we live by the rule of deposits and withdrawals.
A relationship deposit happens any time you put something into a relationship. When you give time, tenderness, forgiveness, understanding, kindness and attention to another person, you’re making a deposit in them that builds trust, connection and better communication. You’re increasing the “relationship capital.”
The opposite is also true. When you’re short, angry, demanding, resistant, brooding, moody, mean or merciless, you withdraw from the relationship bank. You decrease the supply of trust, respect and good will between yourself and the person you’re treating carelessly.
The problem with many of our relationships is that we’re running a deficit in them. We’ve made far too many withdrawals and far too few deposits. We naively wonder why we’re getting so little from the other person, when the fact is, we’ve put very little in.
While it’s human nature to focus on getting rather than giving — on how much we can get from others rather than on how much we can give to them — take the challenge to think and act differently. Follow God’s relationship advice:
Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. — Ephesians 4:31, 32 (NIV)
Increase your relationship deposits and discover how much richer all your relationships will be!